Review: SIORIS' Day by Day Gel Cleanser

Over the past year, I've really gotten into Asian beauty (or "AB", for short) for my sensitive skin. 

Compared to Western brands that I've tried, Korean and Japanese beauty products are really something else. Not only are they Sephora-quality products at drugstore prices, but most of them are designed to be gentle on the skin and cultivate its health naturally. AB products are a far cry from the harsh chemicals we are used to putting on our skin in North America to fix common problems like acne. Don't get me wrong; there are definitely Western brands I love (see my last post for my experience with The Ordinary, based on Toronto, Canada). I have just found AB products to give me better results, faster, especially for my skin type (sensitive, acne-prone, combination).

That being said, I wanted to use this blog as a platform to review some of my favorite skincare products, both AB and otherwise. I've found reviews of this format on r/AsianBeauty to be exceptionally helpful when doing skincare research and figuring out which products to purchase. Hopefully you will find them helpful, too!

Meet SIORIS' Day by Day Gel Cleanser. I found out about this product on a K-beauty blog article outlining double-cleansing products for those with cystic acne (I seriously need all the help I can get). This cleanser was being touted as a 99.9% natural, gentle, low-pH, low foam cleanser perfect for use after oil cleansing. It's reasonably priced ($22.99 for 150 mL on Amazon), but still a little more than I'd spend on a face wash; I decided to splurge on this to try to help fix my skin.

SIORIS claims that the cleanser's pH is 5.52, and that 61% of the ingredients are composed of organic essential oils (generally this means the ingredients are grown without the use of traditional pesticides, but many companies use it synonymously with "natural", so this didn't have too much of an effect on my decision to purchase this). That being said, the ingredients list looks promising:

"*Golden Jeju Pomelo Peel Extract (56%), Decyl Glucoside, Glycerin, Houttuynia Cordata Extract (5%), Lauryl Glucoside, Polyglyceryl-5 Oleate, Salix Nigra (Willow) Bark Extract (2%), Xanthan Gum, Sodium Chloride, Pinus Sylvestris Leaf Extract, Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Fruit Extract, Pentylene Glycol, Propanediol, Water, Citric Acid, Polyglyceryl-10 Laurate, Polyglyceryl-10 Myristate, Gardenia Florida Fruit Extract, Pelargonium Graveolens Flower Oil, Citrus Aurantium Dulcis (Orange) Peel Oil, Helianthus Annuus (Sunflower) Seed Oil, Amyris Balsamifera Bark Oil, Anthemis Nobilis Flower Oil (* indicates organic farming)" (Source: Amazon; ingredients are not listed on the bottle itself)

Note only one ingredient is "farmed organically". Again, not an issue for me, but I wanted to disclose this in case anyone is trying to go all natural. From what I was able to research, most, if not all, of these ingredients, especially those at the top of the list (i.e. There is a higher concentration of them in the product) have a low comedogenic score (around 0-2). The higher this number, the more likely the ingredient is to clog your pores. One of my caveats with this product is that, allegedly, since it is composed so heavily of natural extracts, it has a shelf life of only about 6 months. I prefer my products to have a shelf life of anywhere from 8-12 months, especially when they come in a relatively large container like this one.

Now for my personal experience: I used this cleanser after oil cleansing in the evening and as my primary cleanser first thing in the morning. The first time I used this, I noticed that feeling we all love from a good AB cleanser; no skin tightness or "squeakiness"! I felt as though this preserved my moisture barrier well, both after oil cleansing and cleansing alone. This truly goes on like a gel; there is little to no foaming, which is a good sign for those with sensitive or dry ski since foaming agents tend to also be drying and/or irritating for some people. However, this was indeed sufficient to remove excess residue from my oil cleanser. I found 3 pumps of this cleanser to be the right amount during both morning and night cleansing. This is definitely going to last a long time, so hopefully I can use it up before the 6-month expiration mark!

The morning after using this, I noticed a decrease in inflammation around my acne which continued over the next few days of use. Obviously just this cleanser isn't going to be enough to heal severe cystic acne, but I can definitely vouch for its ability to reduce sometimes embarrassing redness. I've been using this for several weeks at this point, and I really only have good things to say about it. The only thing I really dislike about this is the smell. It's to be expected that a cleanser marketed as "all natural" isn't going to have any fragrance, but the smell of all these extracts mixed together is honestly a little off-putting. I'm fine dealing with it, but those with more sensitive noses may not be!

I'd give this a solid 4.5 out of 5 stars, losing points for the short-ish shelf life and weird smell. This is honestly a GREAT gentle cleanser for those with similar skin conditions to mine. I would definitely recommend sensitive skin types to give this a try!

- Anna

My Face is Purging!

I always had okay skin up until my 25th birthday.

I think I probably had some kind of crazy hormonal shift around that time because I got the WORST hormonal acne of my life, centered around my chin and jawline. To make things worse, I had wintertime eczema around my mouth at the same time.

In a past post, I mentioned that my skin has been one of my biggest quarantine projects. Between the business of graduate school and watching my spending, I never really took the time to invest in a skincare routine that worked for my skin. Instead, I subscribed to Proactiv MD and hoped it would magically fix my skin.

Let me preface by saying this:  I would recommend Proactiv MD to absolutely no one with sensitive, acne-prone skin. Yes, my face cleared up for a few months, but my skin's moisture barrier was destroyed, the adalpalene (a.k.a. the presciption-strength retinoid that makes up the "MD" part of Proactiv MD) burned my skin and contributed to my eczema, and eventually my skin reflected the massive damage I had been unwittingly subjecting it to for about 8 months. The system truly does work to burn your acne away, but that ends up destroying healthy skin as well.

Fast forward and I've switched mostly to Korean beauty products made for sensitive and damaged skin. These were all soothing on my skin, but I wasn't noticing any real skin brightening, reduction of acne, or scar reducing going on. That's when I really started to do my research, which luckily coincided pretty well with the COVID-19 lockdown.

What I found out is that my skin needed to be renewed, and that meant both treating my existing acne, targeting early signs of aging, and promoting skin cell turnover to get rid of my nasty scarring.

Here are the products it looked like I needed to incorporate into my routine:

• Vitamin C - A powerful antioxidant that promotes skin brightening and correction of hyper pigmentation. The skin reacts to vitamin C by attempting to "heal" itself by producing more collagen and elastin. My skin is super sensitive, and vitamin C is the same thing as ascorbic acid which can be really harsh on the skin. I knew I was going to need a milder vitamin C derivative. I ended up going with The Ordinary's Ascorbyl Tetraisopalmitate 20% in Vitamin F. This is a very mild derivative, and, from my research, seemed like a good match for my skin.
• A mild retinoid - Retinoids also act as skin healers by promoting production of collagen. They're great for acne because they both unclog pores and prevent dead cells from clogging pores. This was going to be my best bet at getting rid of my acne. I just needed a mild formulation that causes significantly less irritation than something of prescription strength. I went with The Ordinary's Granactive Retinoid 2% in Squalane due to its low concentration of active ingredient, and squalane's moisturizing properties (it's a really great carrier oil for skincare products).

I'll probably make a post about my entire skincare regimen eventually, but these are the two products I've noticed making a huge change to my skin.

Because these two ingredients have been increasing my skin cell turnover rate, I've noticed that some HUGE cysts I've had deep in my chin for years are coming to the surface and breaking into massive, painful whiteheads. To be frank, my face looks really terrible in the areas I usually get clogged pores, but looks amazing everywhere else! That means my chin and forehead are breaking out like crazy, while my cheeks, nose, and jawline are smooth and bright. So what the heck is going on here?

Turns out my face is doing something called purging, which is a pretty typical reaction to products that cause an increase in skin cell turnover rate. These products are quite literally pulling absolutely all the nasty stuff deep in my skin up to the surface that's been down there for God knows how long, and bursting them at the surface. 

At first, I thought I was having a bad reaction to my new products. But apparently, you can tell a purge from a reaction by where acne is forming. If it's in the places you usually break out, it's likely purging. If it's everywhere, it's a bad reaction. 

Long story short, my face is bound to get "worse" before it gets better, but I'm so happy to get all of this nastiness out of my face once and for all! In the meantime, I'm continuing with my normal skincare routine including a gentle cleansing twice a day, serums at night, and sunscreen every morning. 

Hopefully I'll feel confident enough after this is done to post some before and after pictures!

- Anna

Platinum Pixie Cut FAQs

My hair is absolutely, 100%, without a doubt the hottest topic in my life right now.

I am constantly asked by friends, acquaintances, and random strangers in public about my white blonde pixie cut. And honestly, I love talking about it! My hair is probably my favorite thing about myself and I'm very proud of it.

I initially posted a couple short Instagram posts for my followers answering some of the most basic FAQs I get on a regular basis. I'd like to replicate and expand those explanations here for a wider audience (my Insta is currently private), complete with more thorough information and background to my (always ongoing) hair journey.

Without further ado, here are my most-asked questions about my hair and my answers!

"Why did you decide to cut your hair off? Weren't you afraid you were going to look like a man?"

Well, yeah. If you're not afraid you're going to look like a man, did you even get a pixie cut in the first place? The real trigger for the big chop was the fact that I've worked in laboratories for about seven years now. That means long hair up, all the time. I got the point I didn't even enjoy wearing my hair down because I was so used to the feeling of having it up in a bun on the top of my head. And running between lab, classes, lab courses, and work isn't exactly conducive to having your long (and I mean LONG; past my chest) hair down basically ever.

I started the whole short-hair thing in early college initially with a chin-length bob, so I didn't go from super long hair down my back to suddenly nothing. This was definitely a process with many steps that matched my comfort zone at the time.

Pixie from my second year of graduate school,
some time in early 2018, in my natural color

Back to the main point:  Yes, there was the worry in the back of my head that I was going to look like a young boy. But what I discovered instead is the amazing feeling of finding my femininity without having an attribute (i.e. long, flowing hair) strongly associated with being feminine. This might mean getting more into makeup, or even noticing features about your face that your hair was covering in the past. I found out pretty quickly that I have some great cheekbones, even without makeup. I also love that my neck looks so long with short hair. Both of these features, among others made me feel feminine, even without my hair. My hair really had acted as a security blanket for a long time, and this was an amazing way to get out of my comfort zone and discover new things about myself.

"How is your hair so healthy and shiny after going so light?" 

There is one thing and one thing alone I can really attest this to, and that is: I paid a professional to bleach and tone my hair for me. There is zero substitute for this, other than if you yourself are a hair professional and are able to do your own hair at home (which is awesome!). I 100% do not endorse any at-home bleaching products and haven't used them since high school. I also avoid box dye like the plague; the last time I used it was in 2017 before I cut all my hair off. 

When you get a transition like this done at a salon (a.k.a. a "double process" - bleach and then toner or dye), your stylist will take the time to deep condition and care for your hair the way it needs to be taken care of after it's been exposed to a harsh chemical. This is what they are educated in and they are experts! You are paying for this education, trust, and quality of product when you choose to spend money on a professional coloring. 

Final product in late 2019

First time bleaching
and toning in April 2019

That being said, my hair wasn't white blonde from my first double process procedure. My stylist lightened my hair as far as it would go the first time, and put some ashy toner, resulting in a nice light golden-ish color (see left). Several months later I was able to reach my hair "endgame" (see right). There were about 2-3 coloring appointments between these two pictures.

It's also very important for me to specify that my hair was virgin hair before I bleached. This means no chemical treatments had touched any portion of my hair for years, and all of those portions had already grown out. Bleaching on top of already chemically-treated is a great way to get orange hair, even if the old treatment was a long time ago.

You can see this is a whole process; you're not going to get exactly what you're aiming for when you start a transition like this. You just have to own the color you have at the time, and the best way to do that is to have a professional make it look good in the first place!

"What is the coloring process like? Does it hurt?"

It doesn't hurt for me but I've heard mixed reviews. For me, the bleach is itchy and irritating. The toner stings, but not enough for me to get upset about. I'd recommend coming into the salon with "dirty" hair for bleaching; the natural oils protect your scalp from burns.

The entire process, including coloring and a fresh cut, takes about four hours on average, so I usually get it done over the weekend. Here's the process:

1. Application of bleach (~30 minutes)
2. Bleach processing/reapplication (~1.5 hours)
3. Washing and deep conditioning (~30 minutes)
4. Toner application and processing (~20 minutes)
5. Washing (~5 minutes)
6. Cut and blowdry (~45 minutes)

Adding a root smudge (a.k.a. dying roots a darker shade to allow for a more graceful grow-out line) adds another 30 minutes or so to the process.

"How much does it cost to maintain?"

I see a senior stylist who specializes in color and precision cutting at an upscale salon. Given, I live in a relatively low-cost of living area, so take this with a grain of salt. I pay about $100 for color and $50 for a cut. I cut every 6-8 weeks and color every 2-3 months. I always get a cut on the days I color. That averages out to about $200 every 2-3 months, not including products I use at home.

"What toner does your stylist use for the white blonde look?"

My stylist has used both Wella's Color Charm White Lady Toner and Wella's Lightest Ash Blonde T18 Toner. The first is more white while the latter is more silver. I would not recommend using either of these at home. They are ammonia-based and can cause damage to your scalp and hair if used incorrectly. Like I said before, the toner application is probably the most uncomfortable portion of an appointment for me, and my scalp feels sunburned after, and that's when applied by a professional. You've been warned!

After using Wella's T18 Toner

After using Wella's White Lady Toner

"What products do you use at home?"

I have four staple products that are my holy grail hair products, and anything else I need, I usually rotate out depending on price, etc. Here are my five must-haves:

• Truss Blond Shampoo - Deposits purple pigment to keep yellow tones at bay. 
• Truss Blond Conditioner - Works with the shampoo to keep hair ashy and not brassy.
• John Frieda Frizz Ease Daily Nourishment Leave-In Conditioner - Offers extra hydration and smoothing after using the Truss conditioner in the shower. Also great because it's a white cream; it won't add unnecessary color to hollow bleached hair shafts.
• Pravana The Perfect Blonde Purple Toning Masque - A two-in-one deep conditioner that nourishes and deposits a LOT of purple pigment. Great for weekly use!
• Wet Brush - A very gentle brush that can be used in wet or fragile hair. I use this all the time except during blow drying.

Here are other things I use regularly that I don't have a favorite brand for:

• Dry shampoo - I use this any time my hair looks greasy between wash days. 
• Heat protectant - Absolutely necessary for blow drying or straightening, especially on chemically-treated hair!
• Pomade - For after blow drying or for days I just want to style and go. 

"What is your at-home hair routine?"

I wash my hair every three days with the Truss system and wear a shower cap on the days I don't wash to keep my hair from getting wet. After washes, I use the John Frieda leave-in conditioner and brush through with the Wet Brush. Sometimes I do a blowout for fun after spritzing with heat protectant. I will use the Pravana masque once every 1-2 weeks in place of the normal Truss conditioner. I let it set in my hair for at least 10 minutes and brush through with a wide tooth comb before rinsing. 

"How are you keeping your hair in check during quarantine?"

I actually own a pair of hair cutting scissors, so I use those to dust the ends of the layers created by my last appointment with my stylist. I also use them to trim the nape of my neck and around my ears. Office scissors won't work for this; you're going to give yourself a ton of split ends with the wrong kind of scissors. You can find some sharp scissors on Amazon if you're desperate. Between trims and using the Pravana masque, my cut and color don't look too bad! My roots are growing out a ton, but those will have to wait until quarantine is over since I won't use bleach at home.

Any other questions about my hair? Ask in the comments!

- Anna

My Quarantine Goals

Let's face it: no matter what you do for a living, it's likely you have some extra time now that you're working exclusively from home due to quarantine, especially if you're a student.

You've heard it all over social media in the past month and a half; now is a prime time to learn something new or get back into old hobbies. And it's a great idea to discover (or rediscover) things you love outside of work, even if you love what you do! Here are just some of the things I'm trying to incorporate or reincorporate into my life during this time.

Daily German practice:  I started learning German on Duolingo before quarantine began since it's my family's mother tongue that's kind of been lost to the generations since after my ancestors left Eastern Europe around World War I. I guess this is my way of exploring some of my family's heritage? Regardless, the language fascinates me, and my reading fluency in Latin has actually helped me a ton with this, surprisingly! During quarantine, I find it easier to remind myself to do my daily lessons and complete my daily goals. I've noticed myself making some real progress in the past month with more consistent practice.

Learn Python:  I used Python very briefly during my first year of graduate school, and coding fascinates me. It'll also make a great resume builder for after graduation. I've been using John Zelle's Python Programming: An Introduction to Computer Science to get me up to speed with basic theory and for helpful practice projects outlined throughout the book. Otherwise, I Google as I go to learn new commands and skills. It's also helpful that I'm quarantined with my boyfriend who has a bachelor's degree in computer science.

Use my Fitbit more effectively:  I own the Fitbit Versa, which I wear all the time except in the shower - even to bed. Now is the perfect time to get into monitoring my sleep, health, and steps more effectively, which I've definitely been slacking on, even though I have a super cool piece of technology that gives me so much insight into my health. For those of you who bullet journal, Fitbit spreads and fitness tracking spreads are a lot of fun!

Diversify my fitness routines:  Obviously the gym in my apartment complex is closed until further notice, which happened right around the time I switched from a nearly completely cardio routine into weight lifting. I don't have weights at home, and I don't find it practical to buy a set when I'll be renting apartments and moving around for the foreseeable future. I got super lazy once quarantine began. My exercises have mostly been taking walks downtown when the weather allows. I'd really love to start some resistance and body weight routines from home that I can stick to and incorporate into my normal routine after this is all over.

Fine-tune my diet:  I've been using this time to really think hard about my diet and eat intentionally; this means listening to my body and really thinking about the foods I'm putting into my body. During my normal work schedule, I was running around in lab all day, coming home and working out for an hour, going out at night...you get the point. Because of all my activity, I was eating a LOT! My body needed that energy to keep going at my normal pace. Now that I'm not nearly as active anymore, I find I'm a lot less hungry, too. I'm usually not even hungry for lunch on most days. I am a big proponent of intuitive eating, and I might make a future post about this topic since I swear by it! Taking the time to listen to my body and decide what I need to stay at my healthiest is so important for adapting to a new (even if temporary) lifestyle while keeping a steady weight and overall healthy body.

Fix my skincare routine:  Surprisingly, this is probably my biggest quarantine "project". I have very sensitive, acne-prone, combination skin and it was an absolute nightmare at the beginning of quarantine; painful, inflamed cysts around my chin and jawline along with an overall dull appearance to the rest of my face. I also have significant damage from using Proactiv MD for about a year, a topic I'll probably revisit later. I've done a TON of research on what my skin type needs and how to fix common problems and improve overall skin health. I follow the 10-step Korean skincare system, and have switched all of my products to brands that are made for sensitive skin. Some of my favorites right now are Etude House, SIORIS, and The Ordinary. I'll do a post on my skincare journey later for anyone interested.

What are your biggest quarantine goals? Let me know in the comments!

- Anna

Working Remotely as a Graduate Student

When I first heard that campus was closing and that I would be expected to work from home for the foreseeable future, I can't say I was disappointed. 

After all, since I'm in the late stages of my degree, I usually split my day up into lab work hours and writing hours. Usually, I would go into lab from 9:00 A.M. to 12:00 P.M., head home for lunch, and then either stay home or visit a local coffee shop to get some writing (and other out-of-lab tasks) finished. I figured, how different can a government-mandated work-from-home order be than what I was doing already?

It turns out working from home can be a major transition for those of used to working in an environment like a laboratory, where we can accomplish tasks that can't be done at home. As STEM students, losing access to our lab can take away a major part of our sense of purpose and well as the type of productivity to which we are accustomed. 

It's taken me about a month to find out what does and doesn't work for me when working from home, as well as discovering what I would consider a productive day. I originally posted a guide like this to r/GradSchool on Reddit and it got hundreds of upvotes, so I wanted to improve and re-share in case it might help you, too!

Tip #1:  Prepare yourself for the day

I've found I have a much more productive day if I start my day as if I'm actually going onto campus and into lab. For me, that means setting an alarm, taking care of morning hygiene, and getting dressed as soon as I wake up. The only real difference is that I don't do my makeup or hair while working from home; it's a time sucker AND it's a nice break for my skin and scalp!  

Tip #2:  Make a to-do list

I find that this is best done either the night before, the first thing in the morning when you sit down to start work for the day. Bullet journals and similar planners are perfect for this kind of thing, and, depending on how creative you want to get, can be a great quarantine hobby! I personally use a semi-structured bullet journal I found for $10 on Amazon. I purchased it specifically because it has checkboxes every day to write tasks and note when you've completed them. Since I'm not running active experiments that usually dictate my day-to-day schedule depending on if they worked or not, sometimes I like to plan out my entire week in advance, if possible. Either way is fine; whatever keeps you on task and feeling organized!

Tip #3:  Set a (reasonable) daily schedule

If you set a reasonable schedule for yourself, it will be a lot harder to wander around your house not knowing where to start. My favorite way to do this is to designate specific times of the day for specific tasks. Here are some different work activities that might take up small (1-2 hours) time slots during my daily schedule:

• Writing/editing manuscripts or thesis
• Reviewing or sorting cited literature
• Raw data analysis
• Data organization
• Textbook/Internet review of concepts specific to my field

You likely can't finish all of these things in one day. If you plan for different tasks on different days, it will make your days seem a lot less monotonous. The varied tasks I take care of on a daily basis in lab is what keeps me stimulated normally at work, so I find varying my days gives me a similar sense of mental stimulation. 

Tip #4:  Use tools to keep yourself on task

On days where I am writing before a deadline, I time my work using the Pomodoro Technique. The technique sets work time for 25 minutes at a time with short 5-minute breaks in between sessions. Eventually, after several work sessions, there is a long 25-minute break. I used the Focus Keeper app available in the App Store. There are many others like it. I find this method to work well on days where it's necessary for me to focus extensively on one task for a long time. 

Tip #5:  Find or make a WFH playlist

I absolutely love listening to music while I work. I use Spotify to build my playlists (you can follow me and any of my playlists here) but Apple Music or another app will work just fine, too. Pick music that keeps you on task and motivated. For me, work music means anything without lyrics. Here are my own Spotify playlists I've created specifically for work done outside of lab:

• #WFH - My work from home playlist. It's a compilation of several lyric-less original soundtracks I enjoy. 
• Mozart - Just Mozart and nothing else! 
• Low-Key Jamz for Doing Science - This is mostly lo-fi and other moody, usually electronic, instrumentals. 
• Vidya Gaems - Selected original soundtracks from some of my favorite video games, plus covers! This is by far my most-followed playlist on Spotify.

Tip #6:  Build your workspace

Where you work is just as important as how you work. I would not recommend working in bed! I'll be the first to say I spend a lot of time in my bed. It's huge and offers a comfortable place to sit while I read, etc. I write my blog posts in bed, play on my Switch in my bed, and read in bed. However, once I start anything work-related, I force myself to sit either at my desk or at my kitchen table. You don't need a designated office to make a work space; I'm a grad student, after all, so my "office" is the desk two feet away from my bed since I live in an apartment with limited rooms and space that I am sharing with two other people. Speaking of other people, if you have roommates or share your living space, I would highly recommend investing in a pair of noise canceling headphones if you have the means to do so. I splurged on these Bose over-ear headphones (in rose gold) and I've never been happier with a purchase. With these, I don't have to worry so much about the distractions of owning a dog and living with others. I also really like lighting a candle in my workspace. Find a space and environment that works for you and go with it!

Tip #7:  Stay in touch with your advisor and lab group

This is arguably the most important tip and goes without saying. It can be easy to lose contact with people during quarantine, but be proactive about contacting your advisor and group members if you need help, a second opinion, etc. My advisor is extremely busy with teaching online classes, so he generally doesn't contact me except for our biweekly online meeting. It's important to reach out and ask for help when you need it so you don't get hung up on something in your daily work. Applications like Slack, Webex, Zoom, Skype, Google Docs, and even FaceTime are great for coworking remotely. 

There you have it; these are my top tips for working from home over the past month and a half! Do you have any additional tips that have worked well for you? Let me know in the comments!

- Anna

Blogging??? Aren't you supposed to be writing your thesis?

Yes. The answer is yes.

But, one of the most important things I've learned from this quarantine is, attempting to be productive 100% of the time is impossible and can even be emotionally and mentally damaging.

I think we can all agree that things suck right now. People are losing their jobs, homes, and lives each and every day. Those of us fortunate to still have those things are stuck indoors for the foreseeable future (maybe that's what you enjoy, though!). Nearly every aspect of life as we know it has changed completely. 

For me, COVID-19 meant losing access to all on-campus facilities, including my laboratory, a.k.a. the lifeline of my thesis and ultimately, the progression of my doctoral degree. I was getting ready to defend my thesis in July, graduate in August, and take a much-deserved ten-day Caribbean island-hopping vacation with two of my best girl friends. Since mid-March, I've had to cancel my trip and postpone my graduation date until further notice. I was so close to finally leaving organized education for the first time in my 26 years on this earth when the rug was pulled out from underneath of me. Don't get me wrong; I am unbelievably grateful to be healthy, have a home that I can continue to pay for, live in a small city that remains relatively unaffected by the pandemic, and be in lockdown with a great roommate and my boyfriend (plus my dog and lizard) until this is over.

So...I should easily be able to be super productive with all this extra time I'm not spending doing experiments, right? That's so much time for writing! My thesis should be done in approximately a month at this rate!

Yeah, that's what I initially thought, too. Turns out this whole situation has a really negative impact on the human psyche. Several universities across the globe and the World Health Organization (WHO) have already published tons of papers and studies on how the pandemic has affected the general public's mental health. They've found that the general senses of paranoia and panic are affecting many people strongly during this time, especially when it comes to being able to complete work-related tasks.

For me, this whole situation has made my work seem insignificant and pointless when thousands of people just three hours south of my apartment are dying, even though I'm contributing to science, generally speaking. For the first few days of quarantine, I was able to keep to a 7-hour work day from the desk in my room. Since then, I have to split up my day into mini-chunks of work just to get anything done because my mind is constantly racing. I'm stressed because I'm not nearly as productive as I was in lab, and that stress is compounded by the fact that funding agencies are pulling money out of non-COVID-related research across the country. Always in the back of my mind, I consider what my plan will be if my funding goes under. Of course, I also don't want to disappoint my advisor; I'm lucky to have a supportive (yet strict) PI who expects and encourages the best from his graduate students. 

What I'm trying to say is, don't beat yourself up for your lack of productivity. Taking things day by day is the best course of action right now; it is NOT the time to plan for the future! It's taken me a while to realize this, but I'm starting to understand it's definitely true. Letting go of things you don't have control of can be so freeing.

I'll be posting some of my work from home tips soon, catered to graduate students, of course! After all, I've spent about a month figuring out what does and doesn't work for me. Hopefully some of them work for you, too!

- Anna